An exercise in the sobriety book I’m currently reading says to try and pinpoint down the beliefs you have about drinking then rearrange the wording so you can look at this belief differently, maybe see that it in fact does the opposite of what you think it does for you. It’s somewhat confusing but I’m going to give it a go. I’m going to have a blog entry each day about demolishing a belief of mine. And sadly, there are many…
Today’s? One of my BIGGEST beliefs with alcohol is:
“I cannot have ‘true’ fun on the weekends if I’m not drinking.”
I know that this isn’t entirely accurate. I know there are holes in this thinking. After all I’ve HAD fun while out sober on the weekends. A winery visit last July, a family vacation up in Colorado, a few evenings with our closest friends grilling steaks, a couple of holidays. I just haven’t done enough of these weekends in a row, enough social outings, period, without booze. I’ve planted the seed in my head that I NEED to drink to have fun, so I prime at home before even going out. And it’s not like I’m going to abstain from drinking for the night after I’ve already started. Hecks no! I just add to the number of units I imbibe.
I haven’t trusted myself to believe that I’m going to have fun if I’m not drinking. I haven’t fully taken the plunge.
So to reword this “belief,” I could say:
“I CAN have ‘true’ fun on the weekends without drinking; I just need to allow myself the opportunity.”
It’s talked about quite frequently in these quit-lit books that you can establish new neural pathways. You essentially can kick out those old beliefs and rewire/retrain your brain to enjoy living without alcohol. I need to do this. I need to stop being so afraid that I’m going to ruin my weekend by NOT drinking, because that’s all it really is–a fear. I need to conquer this. To get back my control.